Ryou Bakura, Ringmaster Extraordinare
by dark-angel-rising
Summary: Selfexplanatory title, pretty much about Ryou and him trying to maintain his sanity with Yami Bakura in the house. Good luck. Rated T for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**Ryou Bakura, Ringmaster Extraordinare**

**By dark-angel-rising**

**Chapter 1 **

Ryou Bakura considered himself to be a level-headed, calm, and rational person. However, had someone come up to him a year ago and told him that he would soon be possessed by an evil Egyptian spirit, he would have promptly told that person, (politely, mind you,) to check in to the nearest mental hospital. Now, said evil Egyptian spirit was draped over the couch, watching TV and stuffing his face with Cheetos. How lovely.

"Bakura," Ryou said, pulling his backpack off and dropping it on the floor. "have you even moved since I left?"

The white-haired spirit looked constipated in deep thought. "No, I believe I was lying on my stomach when you left."

Ryou rolled his eyes.

"Well, I'm gonna be upstairs working on homework –" He was interrupted by Bakura.

"You do that."

"Can you please make dinner?" He asked, making his way to his room.

"Nope."

"Bakuuuura…"

"NO! I will not cook for you! It's the other way around you stupid mortal!" Bakura snapped angrily, no longer staring at the tv like a braindead idiot.

Ryou rolled his eyes again. "Well, if I'm such a such a 'stupid mortal' surely I would screw dinner up…"

"Yeah, you're right maybe I should – NO! I will not be tricked by you! I will not make dinner!"

Ryou sighed in exasperation. "Let me put it this way, either you make dinner, or you live outside in the dumpster in the alley." Fear crept into the Thief King's eyes.

"You wouldn't dare."

Ryou stalked up to him looking downright menacing, his eyes glinting in the light.

"Try me."

* * *

"EEEEK! What is that!" Ryou shrieked like a little girl, falling off his chair. Bakura looked confused by his hikari's actions. _Stupid sissy hikari._ He thought to himself.

"Dinner."

Ryou glared at his yami. "How many times do I have to tell you! The rats that live in the sewer are not for eating!" Bakura looked adorably confused again. (A/N: Author sighs happily and starts dancing around.)

"These aren't rats. It's broccoli casserole just like you told me to make. Now eat up." He placed the plate covered in unidentifiable black stuff in front of his hikari.

Ryou made a face. "Let's just go order some pizza."

* * *

Author's Note –

I'm sorry this is kinda short, but I swear I'll update soon and the next chapter will be much longer! I promise!

Sorrin: Y'all better enjoy this, she made me stay up the whole night.

DAR: (smacks her) Oh shut up and eat your stroganoff!

Sorrin: Muse abuse! Muse abuse!

Bakura: Ugh, why am I sitting in a smelly basement!

DAR: You're here to help Sorrin with my story. And my basement doesn't smell.

Bakura: Sorrin's the cat-chick in the cage, right?

DAR: Yup.

Sorrin: I agree with you, this basement really does smell.

DAR: It doesn't smell!

Bakura: Yup, it smells like feet.

DAR: Blame my brothers.

Bakura: Feh.

Anyways, uh, review!

DAR


	2. Chapter 2

**Ryou Bakura, Ringmaster Extraordinare**

**REVIEWS!**

**FallenAngel16 – **Thankies!

**ladyvella42** – It's a lot like my cooking too. Enjoy the next chapter!

**Yamigal** – Oh, well, welcome then. I typed. There, ya happy?

* * *

**Chapter 2**

The quiet streets of Domino City were anything but quiet as a blue car sped around a corner, going at least a hundred above the speed limit. Beware, people of Domino! Bakura was driving.

**_Flashback_**

"Bakura! We're out of milk! Can you go get some?" Ryou said, entering the living room to find his yami staring at the tv again. The white-haired boy rolled his eyes in annoyance. The dark spirit should seriously get out of the house more often.

"No." Came the monotone reply.

"Why not?"

"I don't wanna walk all the way to the store." They were both silent, one thinking, the other fearing what the other was thinking. "Hey Ryou," Bakura asked almost nicely. "can you teach me how to drive?"

_**End Flashback**_

"Bakura! LOOK OUT!" Ryou screamed as Bakura made another dangerous turn, nearly knocking over the hot dog dude.

Screech!

The white-haired teen clutched at his chest, breathing heavily as the car nearly slammed into a building. Next to him, Bakura laughed maniacally and pressed the poor car to go faster. Again he nearly ran over someone and Ryou was nearing hysteria.

"WATCH THE ROAD!" He cried, as Bakura ran a stoplight.

"STOP YELLING AT ME!"

"Bakura!"

He reached over and grabbed the wheel, just in time to avolid a collision with a large truck. Why the hell were there so many cars and people on the streets today?

Thoughts of 'How the hell did I agree to this?' and 'What did I ever do to deserve this?' Raced through his head. He looked up and shouted,

"BAKURA! THE RAILING!" The ancient thief turned sharply making Ryou feel like throwing up. He dared not put his head between his knees on account of being scared out of his mind. He held tightly to his car-handle. (A/N: I have no idea what these thingies are called. They're the handles over the passenger doors. Yeah. Honestly, what are they called?) His knuckles had invented a new meaning of the word white, while his face did the same thing to the word green. Next to him Bakura grinned.

"I think I'm starting to get the hang of this." He commented happily, running another light.

Nothing but pure terror and horror were on his passenger's face.

Ryou closed his eyes, praying this was just a dream… a hellish nightmare from which he'll awake from…

HONK!

Nope… it's real…

They dangerously missing becoming pancakes against another wall… people running and screaming "RUN AWAY CAR!"

"BAKURA! WATCH OUT FOR THOSE PEOPLE!" Ryou screamed (yet again) as his other half nearly missed a couple of old people, who of course didn't notice a thing.

Crash!

Bang!

Boom!

If possible, his heart was racing even faster.

Bakura just shrugged, "It's just a little dent." He said carelessly.

"THAT WAS NOT A LITTLE DENT!"

"You worry too much Ryou."

Ping!

Crunch!

And came to a perfect stop in front of the local Piggly Wiggly.

The door opened and Ryou practically fell out, thanking Kami-sama for being alive, and hugging the cement like there was no tomorrow. Bakura calmly got out of the car, and raised an eyebrow at his hikari's actions.

"See that wasn't so bad. I think I'm quite good at this driving thing."

He of course didn't remember the twenty near crashes… the dented light pole… nearly running over forty people… the roadkill cat, or the numbers of dents and missing parts in the car…

Who cares anyway?

**

* * *

Authors Note –**

**Well? Was it good? Bad? Loosing my touch? TELL ME PEOPLE!**

**Please?**

**DAR**


End file.
